I can't say whether or not I am working towards my leadership style, but I can definitely say that I am working on who I am. I am not sure if figuring out who I am makes me a better leader, but to me a better leader it is important to know I am. This semester has been a rough one, but through it all, I am learning many things about many different things.
One of the moments that are sticking out as I think about this is friendships and the role it has played in my life. Being a part of a clique makes things harder and makes it harder to get to know other people. Due to the break up of a strong friendship, it has led me to interact and socialize with people that I otherwise would not have. As a leader, it is important to be open to associating with different types of people. Actually, I am grateful that I was able to become Tamasia instead of a member of some 'clique.' It's important to be able to become a person, stand along, and be an individual, especially if one wants to be a leader.
Specifically, when it comes to my leadership style - It is hard to say which leadership style is MY leadership style. Simply put, and I can't remember which book said this, but it is hard to have one leadership style. One has to be able to adapt and flip flop depending on the situation at hand. So, I guess I am working on my leadership style by being able to adapt and know how to take charge and make progress by looking at what needs to be handled.
Personally speaking, and like Madsen's book, things that take place in one's childhood or life- add to their leadership potential. With the many downfalls that has taken place within the past few months, I have learned to remain optimistic and believe that things will work out how they should be, plus being able to cope and sustain through the hard times makes one able to be a strong leader. Simply put, I am working on my leadership style by dealing with the discrepancies that are tossed my way.
Being a leader means a lot... but one has to have the personality to go along with it. The personality has to be many qualities; too many to name in fact. It's hard to think about what I am doing to work on my leadership style because although I am a leader and capable of taking initiative and making change, most times I do not consider myself a leader. Having taken this class, I have learned a lot and was enriched greatly.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Monday, April 6, 2009
Tamasia J. to the rescue!
One night, I was hanging out with one of my guy friends. He's a really cool guy. He makes me laugh, he's really sweet and for the most part, he does all the right things.. some of the time. We're hanging in his dorm, talking and laughing like we always do and he gets a phone call. It was weird because his phone was flipped over and on silent and somehow I saw it lighting up. I tell him is phone was ringing. He answers and from that point on it was not good.
As he is on the phone listening to whomever he is talking to, his tone does not sound good. I'm listening and hoping that it's not what I was thinking it was. Unfortunately, it was. A man who has had a strong impact on his life has suddenly died an awful death. Now, at first I didn't know this and I also did not know what to do, because for the most part, we are fairly new in each others' lives. People respond differently and need different things when they are hurt or angry or even happy. Honestly, I did not know what to do. All I could do was what I would have wanted if that would have happened to someone close to me. Oh man, I would be devastated.
When he began to cry, I knew it was something major. Still a little unsure, I took him my arms and told him if he needed to talk I was all ears. He began to cry on me and it was so sad and cute at the same time. After a while, he began to talk. I never said anything. All I did was listen. I still did not know what to do. Something like this has never happened to me before. I continued to hold him and if he began to cry harder, I would hold him tighter just to show that I was there. I was.
For the next couple of days, I checked on him here and there. I did not want to smother him. I mean, this person is something like a stranger. I did want him to know that I cared because I sincerely did.
As he is on the phone listening to whomever he is talking to, his tone does not sound good. I'm listening and hoping that it's not what I was thinking it was. Unfortunately, it was. A man who has had a strong impact on his life has suddenly died an awful death. Now, at first I didn't know this and I also did not know what to do, because for the most part, we are fairly new in each others' lives. People respond differently and need different things when they are hurt or angry or even happy. Honestly, I did not know what to do. All I could do was what I would have wanted if that would have happened to someone close to me. Oh man, I would be devastated.
When he began to cry, I knew it was something major. Still a little unsure, I took him my arms and told him if he needed to talk I was all ears. He began to cry on me and it was so sad and cute at the same time. After a while, he began to talk. I never said anything. All I did was listen. I still did not know what to do. Something like this has never happened to me before. I continued to hold him and if he began to cry harder, I would hold him tighter just to show that I was there. I was.
For the next couple of days, I checked on him here and there. I did not want to smother him. I mean, this person is something like a stranger. I did want him to know that I cared because I sincerely did.
Now that I think about it, I am glad I was there because I was not going to go and hang out with him that night. It’s weird the way things work out.
What would I do differently? Nothing. I think I handled the situation quite well. The entire time, I was thinking about my favorite person. If she was to suddenly not be in my life, I would go crazy. Even though her and I do not communicate all the time, just knowing that I CAN makes me smile. It would be difficult knowing that I could not call her for whatever reason, especially when she has been there for me through the tough times the last couple of years. I don't know, life is tough sometimes. One just has to be able to take the ball that's thrown at them and run with it.
I wonder, did I run? Or did I drop the ball?
TJ.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Words of the Wise - Advise to young women
Honestly, I wish I had someone to have tole me (warned me, actually) about many things. Everyone's lifestyle is different which means that 'advice' will differ. I find myself to be pretty well-rounded - and would say that I am capable of giving advice to any young woman in need.
Off the top of my head, what advice would I give to a young woman?
Lets see...
First, and foremost, I would have to advise them to follow their hearts. I have found that in life, one has to done what makes them happy. We only live once. Even if that thing that once made you happy, no longer does - that's okay because from that experience one will learn something. In life, the only way to learn something is though making a mistake and falling on your face.
Secondly, GO TO THE GYM! LOL. No, but seriously, I would advise a young woman to find the one thing that can just take them away and do that a couple nights a week to end their night or start their day. For me, it's going to the gym. It is important to have that one thing that makes me feel complete leaving me in a place where I am not worrying about what needs to be paid or completed, how many chapters I have to read or who I have to email and all the other crazy things that go on inside of a college students' head. The good thing for me, it's going to the gym. That's two in one!
Thirdly, WRITE THINGS DOWN! Writing things down will keep one from going insane! Write things down and finding the one thing that takes them away and they are on their way to sanity! When I write things down, it keeps me on track and that way I do not forget about anything that needs to get done. It also helps me better manage my time. Knowing that I have 5 things to do in 2 hours - makes me think like okay, which is more important? what can wait? Stuff like that. Trust me! It helps! I told my roommate to do it, and it really helped her out!
Fourth... lets see... Do not be afraid to fail or look stupid or make a mistake or be challenged. As I have said earlier, those are the moments you will treasure most because you will learn SO much about yourself. You never know what may be the result of the challenge. Something you thought was so hard maybe become a passion, who knows. The only thing you can do is TRY.
Looks like my advice is running short... but, here's a few quick ones.
TJ.
Off the top of my head, what advice would I give to a young woman?
Lets see...
First, and foremost, I would have to advise them to follow their hearts. I have found that in life, one has to done what makes them happy. We only live once. Even if that thing that once made you happy, no longer does - that's okay because from that experience one will learn something. In life, the only way to learn something is though making a mistake and falling on your face.
Secondly, GO TO THE GYM! LOL. No, but seriously, I would advise a young woman to find the one thing that can just take them away and do that a couple nights a week to end their night or start their day. For me, it's going to the gym. It is important to have that one thing that makes me feel complete leaving me in a place where I am not worrying about what needs to be paid or completed, how many chapters I have to read or who I have to email and all the other crazy things that go on inside of a college students' head. The good thing for me, it's going to the gym. That's two in one!
Thirdly, WRITE THINGS DOWN! Writing things down will keep one from going insane! Write things down and finding the one thing that takes them away and they are on their way to sanity! When I write things down, it keeps me on track and that way I do not forget about anything that needs to get done. It also helps me better manage my time. Knowing that I have 5 things to do in 2 hours - makes me think like okay, which is more important? what can wait? Stuff like that. Trust me! It helps! I told my roommate to do it, and it really helped her out!
Fourth... lets see... Do not be afraid to fail or look stupid or make a mistake or be challenged. As I have said earlier, those are the moments you will treasure most because you will learn SO much about yourself. You never know what may be the result of the challenge. Something you thought was so hard maybe become a passion, who knows. The only thing you can do is TRY.
Looks like my advice is running short... but, here's a few quick ones.
- Remember, it's your life, live for you. You can't possibly please everyone! You'll go crazy.
- DO NOT SETTLE!!!! If in your heart (advice #1) you believe you can obtain more, go for it! Just because someone tells you you cannot does not that you do not. That would be silly
- Read between the lines. People are not always trustworthy (at least in my life they haven't been) so you have to see what people want you to see and pay attention to detail. For me, this has saved me from a lot of heart ache. All I did was PAY ATTENTION!
- Don't be afraid to say no.
TJ.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
My First Spring Break
When students plan for Spring Break, they think about having a good time probably getting drunk and partying until they cannot party anymore. But me, I spent my Spring Break learning valuable lessons.
Although I spent time with people I care about, most of them (family, not friends) irritated the crap out of me. But, after reflecting without being angry because of a dispute, I realized numerous things:
Even though I was HIGHLY upset, I valued what was told to me. At the end of the day, I will be a much stronger individual. Due to the lack of assistance, I will also be better able to take care of myself because I have been on my own for so long.
Although I do not have my "parents," I do have many other people I can depend on. They are the people who keep me together making sure I am okay and alive - for that matter - Everyone needs someone and cannot obviously not make in this tough world alone. The hard part is figuring out who should be in the circle and who should be kicked out. Through this, I also learned what the true meaning of family is. For me, it sucks and even though it sucks, I am STILL so optimistic. I do not understand how or why, but I am glad I am. Family, no matter what - no matter what - is supposed to have your back. It hurts, well not so much any more - but it used to because I do the right thing, all the time. I have also come to find that people who (this may seem insensitive) do not deserve to have always have. I do not deserve to have my parents treat me the way they do. Especially when I have accomplished so much.
It amazes me how I still keep on smiling. I guess that's life.
TJ.
Although I spent time with people I care about, most of them (family, not friends) irritated the crap out of me. But, after reflecting without being angry because of a dispute, I realized numerous things:
- Although people may have your best interest at heart, they do not know what you need. Even though they think do.
- You cannot ask something of someone when they are not knowledgeable of what you are asking for.
- In the eyes of my parents, I am now an adult and therefore cannot seek their assistance.. whether for support or financially..
Even though I was HIGHLY upset, I valued what was told to me. At the end of the day, I will be a much stronger individual. Due to the lack of assistance, I will also be better able to take care of myself because I have been on my own for so long.
Although I do not have my "parents," I do have many other people I can depend on. They are the people who keep me together making sure I am okay and alive - for that matter - Everyone needs someone and cannot obviously not make in this tough world alone. The hard part is figuring out who should be in the circle and who should be kicked out. Through this, I also learned what the true meaning of family is. For me, it sucks and even though it sucks, I am STILL so optimistic. I do not understand how or why, but I am glad I am. Family, no matter what - no matter what - is supposed to have your back. It hurts, well not so much any more - but it used to because I do the right thing, all the time. I have also come to find that people who (this may seem insensitive) do not deserve to have always have. I do not deserve to have my parents treat me the way they do. Especially when I have accomplished so much.
It amazes me how I still keep on smiling. I guess that's life.
TJ.
Tamasia J and Leadership
What makes me a productive leader? What can still be improved?
Thinking about this question, it makes me think about when I began to start a step club at Chatham. One of my positive qualities is being able to take an idea, make it a reality and have people excited about it. At the same time, there were many other people who were against starting a step club at Chatham, because they just thought it was not possible. Little did they know, it is not possible because I would be told no, or because people do not want to do it, it is because of conflicting schedules... so HA!
Anyway, this was a challenge for me. As much as I LOVED {not so much anymore, thanks Chatham (just kidding)} stepping, I was excited and passionate about stepping. When a leader is passionate about something, it shows and it makes it easier to inspire a shared vision (see, I pay attention). After being oh-so-very-passionate and patient, the step club was finally approved! Sounds good, right? Well, the hard part began.
There were conflicting schedules, lack of commitment, lack of enthusiasm... just a lack in many areas. What was I to do? KEEP TRYING! I am productive because I kept trying. I made changes to practice dates, practice times, even practice locations just to keep the energy flowing between the steppers and myself.
In short, I am productive because I do not settle for one way. If it does not work, I do not give up. I also am not a dictator. I ask everyone what they want, so they can have some input. I also try to lead with a smile on my face, even though sometimes I do not feel like smiling.
Some things I need to work on -this is what I always say- slowing down when I speak. When I get excited about something, it just comes out WAY TOO FAST! That doesn't really qualify as leadership, but effectively communicating is majorly important. But, so far it has not come in the way. There are moments when I can just tell when the words are going to come out jumbled and I figure out a different way to say it. So, I am working on it!
Thinking about this question, it makes me think about when I began to start a step club at Chatham. One of my positive qualities is being able to take an idea, make it a reality and have people excited about it. At the same time, there were many other people who were against starting a step club at Chatham, because they just thought it was not possible. Little did they know, it is not possible because I would be told no, or because people do not want to do it, it is because of conflicting schedules... so HA!
Anyway, this was a challenge for me. As much as I LOVED {not so much anymore, thanks Chatham (just kidding)} stepping, I was excited and passionate about stepping. When a leader is passionate about something, it shows and it makes it easier to inspire a shared vision (see, I pay attention). After being oh-so-very-passionate and patient, the step club was finally approved! Sounds good, right? Well, the hard part began.
There were conflicting schedules, lack of commitment, lack of enthusiasm... just a lack in many areas. What was I to do? KEEP TRYING! I am productive because I kept trying. I made changes to practice dates, practice times, even practice locations just to keep the energy flowing between the steppers and myself.
In short, I am productive because I do not settle for one way. If it does not work, I do not give up. I also am not a dictator. I ask everyone what they want, so they can have some input. I also try to lead with a smile on my face, even though sometimes I do not feel like smiling.
Some things I need to work on -this is what I always say- slowing down when I speak. When I get excited about something, it just comes out WAY TOO FAST! That doesn't really qualify as leadership, but effectively communicating is majorly important. But, so far it has not come in the way. There are moments when I can just tell when the words are going to come out jumbled and I figure out a different way to say it. So, I am working on it!
Monday, March 2, 2009
Thoughts about Madsen
As I am reading the book, the thought that always pop into my head is what exactly does a President of a university do? I am aware that is of the book but it is something bothers me, especially since I attend a university.
On a side note, reading the book and talking about it in class brings it into perspective. When I am reading, I do think about connections with the Presidents and myself, but it's totally different reading it alone then talking about it with other people. Especially because for some reason I do not like the book. I makes good points and may very well be true, but when it comes to leadership, everyone develops differently and therefore learns differently. Everyone also does not share the same experiences, have the same family background and support as these university women. With that, that doesn't mean that anyone else is more or less capable of being a university President.
At the same time, it is very important to think about women in a larger picture. I have never thought about myself as less than in the same room as a man. Maybe my time is coming, but I have always (tried to at least) strive as high as possible regardless if the competition is a male. I also feel like being an African American and the notions associated with being one, is stronger than and in a sense is added to being a woman. I am a woman of color. But that does not stop me. I guess, in a sense, I am like those university Presidents because they had the drive to continue and not stop no matter what just like me.
Hey, you never know. I may end up being a university President some day!
On a side note, reading the book and talking about it in class brings it into perspective. When I am reading, I do think about connections with the Presidents and myself, but it's totally different reading it alone then talking about it with other people. Especially because for some reason I do not like the book. I makes good points and may very well be true, but when it comes to leadership, everyone develops differently and therefore learns differently. Everyone also does not share the same experiences, have the same family background and support as these university women. With that, that doesn't mean that anyone else is more or less capable of being a university President.
At the same time, it is very important to think about women in a larger picture. I have never thought about myself as less than in the same room as a man. Maybe my time is coming, but I have always (tried to at least) strive as high as possible regardless if the competition is a male. I also feel like being an African American and the notions associated with being one, is stronger than and in a sense is added to being a woman. I am a woman of color. But that does not stop me. I guess, in a sense, I am like those university Presidents because they had the drive to continue and not stop no matter what just like me.
Hey, you never know. I may end up being a university President some day!
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Everything Happens for a REASON!
Life is tough. I bet you would all agree that there was a time where you just could not believe that it was happening to you.. probably again. That's how I feel all the time. But, guess what? I have come to a conclusion that EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON!
People are hurt for a reason, people are stranded for a reason, people fall for a reason, people are mean for a reason, happy for a reason, fat for a reason (they just couldn't say no, lol) and the list can continue. These things happen because we are supposed to learn from them.
This makes me think about a movie called Pleasantville. Anyone ever saw it? If no, it was a movie that pretty much was set in a time period (i forget which one) where everything was easy, simple, non-emotional and painless. There was only one road, one color (gray) one emotion (happy).. and things in that nature. No one felt anything. They did not even have books! It was insane. Throughout the movie, a brother and sister came and changed it up and their world was never the same. They had a fire for the first time, sex for the first time, missed a basketball shot (yup, it was that insane) and all because it NEEDED to happen.
Things NEED to happen! If they didn't, how will be ever learn. How will we fail? I mean, failure is the root to all success! At times, sure, it does hurt, but in the long run.. years from now.. one will think back and say 'Hey, I'm glad that happened to me! (SIKE!, just kidding).
There have been plenty of things that have happened to me and I am still the most optismtic person one can ever meet. In fact, you would never even think some of things that have happened to me... It's great because I did not let it over power me and keep me from excelling. It's a great thing! Being able to remain strong and on your own two feet. (I know I am rambling, but SO WHAT!)
But, all in all... things happen for a reason.. SO don't cry over spilled milk!
See ya!
People are hurt for a reason, people are stranded for a reason, people fall for a reason, people are mean for a reason, happy for a reason, fat for a reason (they just couldn't say no, lol) and the list can continue. These things happen because we are supposed to learn from them.
This makes me think about a movie called Pleasantville. Anyone ever saw it? If no, it was a movie that pretty much was set in a time period (i forget which one) where everything was easy, simple, non-emotional and painless. There was only one road, one color (gray) one emotion (happy).. and things in that nature. No one felt anything. They did not even have books! It was insane. Throughout the movie, a brother and sister came and changed it up and their world was never the same. They had a fire for the first time, sex for the first time, missed a basketball shot (yup, it was that insane) and all because it NEEDED to happen.
Things NEED to happen! If they didn't, how will be ever learn. How will we fail? I mean, failure is the root to all success! At times, sure, it does hurt, but in the long run.. years from now.. one will think back and say 'Hey, I'm glad that happened to me! (SIKE!, just kidding).
There have been plenty of things that have happened to me and I am still the most optismtic person one can ever meet. In fact, you would never even think some of things that have happened to me... It's great because I did not let it over power me and keep me from excelling. It's a great thing! Being able to remain strong and on your own two feet. (I know I am rambling, but SO WHAT!)
But, all in all... things happen for a reason.. SO don't cry over spilled milk!
See ya!
Tamasia J. University! (TJU)
If I had a university, I am really not sure of what I would have. However, thinking of all the things I want in a university, I might as well just create that. So... Let's see...
I'll start with the size of the university. Medium sized seems fairly nice. A larger place means more opportunities.
Food: Either more than one cafeteria or one that has many options. Options such as, healthy foods, fast foods, grilled, Deli, international cuisine. I would be great to have connections with different restaurants and have them on campus; such as Starbucks, Smoothie King, and maybe a Pizza place. I'm not really big on McDonalds. Wings are great too! Possibly even a Chipotle. Looks like students will gain the FRESHMAN 15 on my campus!
Meal Plans will be awarded by the semester, not the week. As long as one does not go over their amount, they can eat as much as they want!
Academics: Every school cannot be strong in all areas, but I do not want it to be a place where students feel left out. So, if we have a particular major, we, TJU will have the connections, networks, honor societies, active clubs (hopefully, more likely than not) and special events for each particular area of study: Sciences, Education, English, Communication, Business, etc. Each academic area will have it's own building, with it's own facilities, academic advisers and professors. Professors will not be advisers. An adviser is just what they are called. They are there to ADVISE the students.
Advising: Students are required to meet with the adviser. Whether it's an email, or phone call or face-to-face. Advisers need to know what is going on with their students!
Career Placement: Each academic major will it's own set of career placement advisers. Seniors will be required to meet with the senior placement adviser sometime in the first semester. This meeting is to see where the student is and where they plan to be next year and can recieve the appropriate assistance. TJU will host job-fairs and seminars for resume assitance and Mock Interviews.
Now for the fun stuff, TJU will also be a place that is very fun!
Housing: Students must live on campus at least two years. When it comes to building a community, meetings will be held twice a semester asking students want they want to see happen in their residential hall.
- Air Conditioning
-Cable TV
Campus life: TJU is never dead on weekends! Students love to stick around. With out on-campus movie theather and bowling alley, who would want to leave? On the weekend, stop by the Union to hang out and play poll or talk and dance with some of the students. Head to the bowling alley for late-night bowling! Or, catch a movie with friends at the theather! All the popcorn you can eat!
Clubs and Organizations: TJU-Gov, Sororoties and Fraternities, TJU-Dancers, Cultural clubs - Chinese Student Alliance, Black Student Union, Jewish Girls Unite (you name it!) anything can be done at TJU! Future Teachers of American, American Marketing Association, Finance club, psychology club, future doctors, Basketball, Football, Cheerleading, marching Band, Tennis, ROTC, Robicts, TJU-ON AIR... so many things to name!
Financial aid: people actually know what they are doing! Notices are sent out when bills have not been paid. Phone calls are made ahead of time.
Scholarships: Students can be awarded full-scholarships for academics and sports as long as they maintain a 3.0. Students can also be awarded Merit and need based aid. Scholarships are determined by character, leadership ability, acadmics and personal interview. Of course, grades are important, too!
MOST IMPORTANTLY! The President of TJU will be a known face on campus. The President will be a person who is more than the 'President'.. He or she may not know everyone by face, but at least they will be able to say they have some kind of positive experience with her and can put a name with a face.
I'll start with the size of the university. Medium sized seems fairly nice. A larger place means more opportunities.
Food: Either more than one cafeteria or one that has many options. Options such as, healthy foods, fast foods, grilled, Deli, international cuisine. I would be great to have connections with different restaurants and have them on campus; such as Starbucks, Smoothie King, and maybe a Pizza place. I'm not really big on McDonalds. Wings are great too! Possibly even a Chipotle. Looks like students will gain the FRESHMAN 15 on my campus!
Meal Plans will be awarded by the semester, not the week. As long as one does not go over their amount, they can eat as much as they want!
Academics: Every school cannot be strong in all areas, but I do not want it to be a place where students feel left out. So, if we have a particular major, we, TJU will have the connections, networks, honor societies, active clubs (hopefully, more likely than not) and special events for each particular area of study: Sciences, Education, English, Communication, Business, etc. Each academic area will have it's own building, with it's own facilities, academic advisers and professors. Professors will not be advisers. An adviser is just what they are called. They are there to ADVISE the students.
Advising: Students are required to meet with the adviser. Whether it's an email, or phone call or face-to-face. Advisers need to know what is going on with their students!
Career Placement: Each academic major will it's own set of career placement advisers. Seniors will be required to meet with the senior placement adviser sometime in the first semester. This meeting is to see where the student is and where they plan to be next year and can recieve the appropriate assistance. TJU will host job-fairs and seminars for resume assitance and Mock Interviews.
Now for the fun stuff, TJU will also be a place that is very fun!
Housing: Students must live on campus at least two years. When it comes to building a community, meetings will be held twice a semester asking students want they want to see happen in their residential hall.
- Air Conditioning
-Cable TV
Campus life: TJU is never dead on weekends! Students love to stick around. With out on-campus movie theather and bowling alley, who would want to leave? On the weekend, stop by the Union to hang out and play poll or talk and dance with some of the students. Head to the bowling alley for late-night bowling! Or, catch a movie with friends at the theather! All the popcorn you can eat!
Clubs and Organizations: TJU-Gov, Sororoties and Fraternities, TJU-Dancers, Cultural clubs - Chinese Student Alliance, Black Student Union, Jewish Girls Unite (you name it!) anything can be done at TJU! Future Teachers of American, American Marketing Association, Finance club, psychology club, future doctors, Basketball, Football, Cheerleading, marching Band, Tennis, ROTC, Robicts, TJU-ON AIR... so many things to name!
Financial aid: people actually know what they are doing! Notices are sent out when bills have not been paid. Phone calls are made ahead of time.
Scholarships: Students can be awarded full-scholarships for academics and sports as long as they maintain a 3.0. Students can also be awarded Merit and need based aid. Scholarships are determined by character, leadership ability, acadmics and personal interview. Of course, grades are important, too!
MOST IMPORTANTLY! The President of TJU will be a known face on campus. The President will be a person who is more than the 'President'.. He or she may not know everyone by face, but at least they will be able to say they have some kind of positive experience with her and can put a name with a face.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Expectations placed on RA's: Reality? or Fantasy?
Students, faculty and administrative staff expect RA's to be perfect. Perfect in this case means always going to class, in their rooms studying, being available to their residents at any time, not going to parties... things in that nature. When, in fact RA's are growing teenagers (or adults) just like the rest of us who attend college. These are more unrealistic only because RA's are people and simply put, everyone has their day when they do not feel like going to a class, or just want to let lose and have fun. Since an RA has this position, they should be able know their limitations
On a more positive note, RA's are expected to follow the rules and act as a role model to others, be knowledgeable of campus rules ad events, be a good listener, offer advice, treat people with respect, be polite and courteous, among many other things. - These things are more realisitic.
When one is in a high position, more is always expected of them. People feel as though since they have this 'title' a certain level of behavior should be displayed. As an RA, it's about knowing yourself and your responsibilities. Remembering that no matter what time of day, you are always a representation of Chatham University and that means acting in a certain manner. As far as the expectations, it shouldn't be much of a problem. Besides, as long as everything is getting done to the best of my ability and on-time, everything is fine. Being a student, a student leader, an RA, trying to have a social life and just survive is A LOT! Taking a break once in a while never hurts...
On a more positive note, RA's are expected to follow the rules and act as a role model to others, be knowledgeable of campus rules ad events, be a good listener, offer advice, treat people with respect, be polite and courteous, among many other things. - These things are more realisitic.
When one is in a high position, more is always expected of them. People feel as though since they have this 'title' a certain level of behavior should be displayed. As an RA, it's about knowing yourself and your responsibilities. Remembering that no matter what time of day, you are always a representation of Chatham University and that means acting in a certain manner. As far as the expectations, it shouldn't be much of a problem. Besides, as long as everything is getting done to the best of my ability and on-time, everything is fine. Being a student, a student leader, an RA, trying to have a social life and just survive is A LOT! Taking a break once in a while never hurts...
Friday, January 30, 2009
Reflecting on SLPI results...
I was shockingly amazed at my results. I find that people often see you differently than to see yourself. To see that someone views me BETTER than I view myself, is a tremendous compliment. It makes me wonder {{since I rated myself lower}} that the standards I have set for myself are actually higher than I think. Hmm.. I really can't say... In any event, I am glad to have been introduced to the 5 practices of leadership. Something even better, being rated quite high on all five! There is still work to be done, however...
As far as group work, I know that I am capable of bring a lot to the table and I can work with anyone. Flexible, is something that seems to stick out a lot to me since the start of this class. I can bend and move depending on the type of person {{or people}} I am working with.
In connection to being an RA, having pretty high ratings as far as my leadership style shows that I have a possibility of being a well-rounded RA capable of dealing and adapting to any kind of environment {{community}}. I am more so an encourager. That is important being in a new environment, simply because people often need that support system; whether it's only one person or an entire group.
As far as group work, I know that I am capable of bring a lot to the table and I can work with anyone. Flexible, is something that seems to stick out a lot to me since the start of this class. I can bend and move depending on the type of person {{or people}} I am working with.
In connection to being an RA, having pretty high ratings as far as my leadership style shows that I have a possibility of being a well-rounded RA capable of dealing and adapting to any kind of environment {{community}}. I am more so an encourager. That is important being in a new environment, simply because people often need that support system; whether it's only one person or an entire group.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Does Gender Inform Leadership Style?
Thinking about this question makes me think about when I had to facilitate a group of 10th graders. Since it was such a mixed group, I can definitely say that I had to be able to switch off with the way I would facilitate the classes. There were days where I had to be more stern and speak with more authority while other days I can be lenient and laid back. - This switch had nothing to do with it being mixed gendered, though.
Since the group was very mixed - Good girls, conceited girls, divas (as they were called), bad boys, non-english speakers, followers, homosexuals, some with disabilities - I mean, it was really a mixed group of kids and it was my role as a facilitator to give this diverse group of kids a meaningful experience. Same thing goes being a captain of a sports team. Notice I did not recall how many girls and how many boys there were or how many fell into which category. In my instances with leading groups, it just did not matter.
I do not think it was so much what their gender was that made me change my leadership style. It was more about their personality and who they were as a person. Until I came to Chatham, I never had an experience where I had to lead only women. Again, it is not so much about their gender, there are other factors that play into the outcome of the group - either leaving it in a positive or negative position. These other factors are the things that make the leader find a different approach for the group to succeed. Personality traits like being stubborn, having a bad attitude, impatient, not easily trusting - things like that make it harder for a group to progress.
As a leader, one has to be open to trying new techniques to enable the group to prosper. With that, as I have already stated, I do not think my leadership strategies differ when dealing with single-sex versus co-ed. To me, it depends what type of people make up the group, what strategies I will take or not take. One thing that comes to mind now that I think about it is being that I am a woman and working in a group with women, I may have a connection or some kind of unspoken relationship which can possibly make me more lenient with them because I understand them because I am woman myself. Does that make sense?
Until next time,
Teej.
Since the group was very mixed - Good girls, conceited girls, divas (as they were called), bad boys, non-english speakers, followers, homosexuals, some with disabilities - I mean, it was really a mixed group of kids and it was my role as a facilitator to give this diverse group of kids a meaningful experience. Same thing goes being a captain of a sports team. Notice I did not recall how many girls and how many boys there were or how many fell into which category. In my instances with leading groups, it just did not matter.
I do not think it was so much what their gender was that made me change my leadership style. It was more about their personality and who they were as a person. Until I came to Chatham, I never had an experience where I had to lead only women. Again, it is not so much about their gender, there are other factors that play into the outcome of the group - either leaving it in a positive or negative position. These other factors are the things that make the leader find a different approach for the group to succeed. Personality traits like being stubborn, having a bad attitude, impatient, not easily trusting - things like that make it harder for a group to progress.
As a leader, one has to be open to trying new techniques to enable the group to prosper. With that, as I have already stated, I do not think my leadership strategies differ when dealing with single-sex versus co-ed. To me, it depends what type of people make up the group, what strategies I will take or not take. One thing that comes to mind now that I think about it is being that I am a woman and working in a group with women, I may have a connection or some kind of unspoken relationship which can possibly make me more lenient with them because I understand them because I am woman myself. Does that make sense?
Until next time,
Teej.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
My Frist Experience in a Res Hall
I have always had my own room. Eighteen long years of having my own space - a territory to call my own now had to be shared with a stranger. Although my roommate and I texted message on a contant basis, it was nothing like living with her for the first two weeks. Already having allergic reactions, I grew fond of a new one. The smell of cats. At home, my roommate lived with 13 cats (yes, I know). This was one of the things we had NOT spoken about. I tried to deal. Actually, I tried very hard to deal. Constantly sneezing, wheezing, coughing, having a runny nose then a congested nose truly sucked! This became a challenge because I had to talk to her. No one likes telling someone else about their BO, but it had to be done. Easier than I thought it would be, we agreed to buy air fresheners! YES!!
On a different note, I absolutely LOVED being in a Res Hall. Coming from a home where I felt dry and out of place, I was happier than no other to be in a place where I felt comfortable and at home. The first few days of figuring this place out, I immediately thought I could get used to this! Being a native of New York City, I found myself wanting to explore Pittsburgh and all that I can about Chatham by asking a bunch of questions, reading maps and befriending different people.
Other than exploring, thinking back I cannot recall what else I did in my transition from home to here. I did notice that people flocked to who they identified with, though. It was normally a person they thought were most like them and things in that nature. We (most of us) we all new to Chatham and therefore did not know who or what about most things and were friendly because we were all trying to figure out who was nice, who was not, and things in that nature.
Oh yeah, when it was time for a meeting or some kind of RA activity, we would all come together and there would be this amazing group of ladies ready and willing to work together and knock out any task or activity. REGARDLESS!
2nd floor Fickes definitely rocks!!
On a different note, I absolutely LOVED being in a Res Hall. Coming from a home where I felt dry and out of place, I was happier than no other to be in a place where I felt comfortable and at home. The first few days of figuring this place out, I immediately thought I could get used to this! Being a native of New York City, I found myself wanting to explore Pittsburgh and all that I can about Chatham by asking a bunch of questions, reading maps and befriending different people.
Other than exploring, thinking back I cannot recall what else I did in my transition from home to here. I did notice that people flocked to who they identified with, though. It was normally a person they thought were most like them and things in that nature. We (most of us) we all new to Chatham and therefore did not know who or what about most things and were friendly because we were all trying to figure out who was nice, who was not, and things in that nature.
Oh yeah, when it was time for a meeting or some kind of RA activity, we would all come together and there would be this amazing group of ladies ready and willing to work together and knock out any task or activity. REGARDLESS!
2nd floor Fickes definitely rocks!!
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